Bridal Parties

It is a simple fact that many bridal parties have members who live all over the country. When you are trying to plan a wedding, this can make dealing with all of the details much more challenging. These are some things to keep in mind when you are coordinating bridesmaids who live out-of-state.

The first thing to do is to try to keep your bridal party in the loop. A great way to do this is with a wedding website. You can set one up that has a lot of pictures and general information for your guests, with a private password-protected section for your bridesmaids (you wouldn’t want to have your fiance stumble onto a picture of your gown!). This way, rather than bombard them with lengthy emails, you can just drop them a quick note when you have posted something you think they would like to see. Of course, this doesn’t take the place of actually speaking with your friends on the phone or in person, but it can be a very handy tool.

There are many deadlines when planning a wedding, and some of them will involve your bridesmaids. If there are travel or hotel arrangements that they will need to make, be sure to do the legwork for your out-of-towners to make everything as easy as possible for them. If you also have bridesmaids who you see on a regular basis, you might even ask them to “adopt” one of the girls who lives far away to help her keep up to speed. This can be a terrific help if your wedding party is large, but be sure that you are only enlisting the help of friends who are organized and responsible!

The bridesmaid dresses can be one of the trickiest aspects when it comes to a bridal party that is spread far and wide. There are a few different approaches you can take in selecting their gown. Some brides simply make the decision themselves, and hope that everyone can live with it (this is actually what I did for my wedding). Brides who have at least one bridesmaid who lives in the area might take her shopping for bridesmaid dresses. At least you will have an actual bridesmaid to try on the samples. Another approach is to choose your top three dresses, and let each bridesmaid have a vote on your website. This can work out very well, as long as you would be fine with any of the dresses that you show them.

It is not only the choice of bridesmaid dress that will need to be coordinated. Once you have decided on a gown, they will all need to be ordered as a group to ensure that they are cut from the same dye lot of fabric. If you are going with black dresses, this might not be so necessary, but for other colors, the variation can be very, very noticeable. When your bridesmaids live out of town, the usual procedure is to have them go to a bridal shop in their hometown to have professional measurements taken, and then they call up the bridal shop where you found the dresses to put down a deposit. Most shops will not actually place the order until they have the deposit from every bridesmaid, so bear in mind that one procrastinator can delay the entire order. To ensure that your bridesmaid dresses arrive in time, it is up to you to check in with the bridal shop to make sure that all of your friends have called in.

It is customary for a bride to give her attendants a thank you gift, such a classic pearl bridesmaid jewelry. It is best to present your bridesmaid gifts when the entire group is together. If you will be seeing all of your bridesmaids for a pre-wedding shower or bachelorette party, that could be a good time to give them their gifts. Another nice option is to have the traditional bridesmaids’ luncheon two or three days before your wedding, and to give each bridesmaid the pearl jewelry at that special event.

Planning a wedding with distant bridesmaids can make for extra work, but it is definitely worth it to have all of your closest friends by your side on your wedding day. With a little planning and coordination, you will find that getting your bridal party organized for your big day is not really so challenging after all.